Review: New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded & Apparently, I Am ALL-IN On The Winter Olympics

Junk Food Nation, I have to admit – I’ve always been kind of lukewarm towards the Winter Olympics. I dunno why – I’ve skied before and like it. My friends all ski and snowboard. Plus, I watch the X-Games sometimes, and I found myself mesmerized by those too. But aside from all the Sochi teasing, I was sort of ho-hum going into the Opening Ceremonies and the first two days of games.

Well, I was wrong. Once I had the Olympics flipped on, I couldn’t STOP WATCHING IT. I dunno – maybe it’s just the sports fan in me, but I just COULDN’T LOOK AWAY. Men’s Slope Style??? Absurd – by the time they hit that third jump they are falling four-five stories. Women’s Biathlon? DRAMA FOR YOUR MAMA. I had no idea what the rules were, and when they explained the penalty loop, my jaw dropped. Downhill Alpine Skiing?? THEY ARE FLYING DOWN A MOUNTAIN THE HEIGHT OF THREE EMPIRE STATE BUILDINGS AT RIDIC SPEEDS TO CERTAIN DEATH. The commentators noted, “Oh, they dump water on these courses to make them more icy and faster.” YES, GET ME CLOSER TO MY DEMISE AS FAST AS POSSIBLE.

Add on top of that my realization that some of these contestants are freaking stunning (like the Canadian sisters that won gold/silver in Moguls and the snowboarder from Norway), and I am ALL-IN! TONIGHT: HOCKEY. CURLING. MORE SHORT TRACK SPEED SKATING.  LET’S DO THIS.

What have YOU been watching? Tell me in the comments below!  Oh, one thing I have NOT been watching: ice dancing.  Still can’t get into it.  Someone convince me otherwise.

Today’s junk food: New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded!

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded: The Money Shot?

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded: A Warm Nacho Cheese Snack!

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded were spotted at my local 7-Eleven. Wait, is it 7-Eleven of 7-11?  Whatever it is, my jaw dropped when I saw this. Something NEW at 7-Eleven that isn’t just a new flavor of Slurpee?  WHAT.

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded: Fried Mozz…sort of?

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded is a warm nacho cheese snack, which sort of gives me the heebie jeebies just thinking of it.  The picture makes it look like fried mozzarella, which I love.  And I DO like nacho cheese…I guess… are these breaded in Doritos? So many questions.

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded: DELICIOUS

So, the first look of these New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded = fried triangles on a metal sheet tray under a heat lamp.  So, not fresh out of any fryer…right.  I am scared for my life.  Time to get these home…

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded: GUARANTEED FRESH

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded are guaranteed fresh.  Uh huh.

I sniffed the bag – I had to admit, the bag did smell of Doritos.  Like a nice salty Nacho Cheese smell.

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded: Whoa

I dumped out the four pieces of New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded I purchased…and there they are.  They were warm, and felt crispy…almost too crispy.  Like, sitting-under-a-heat-lamp-for-too-long crispy.  Which is exactly the case.

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded: Some burnt edges

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded were SUPER crispy outside. I wasn’t sure if these had started out in the deep fryer, but whatever the case, these were CRISPY – like the outsides of perfect mozzarella sticks.

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded; close up

The breading felt like that of a mozz stick – firm, rough.  This surface was speckled with some random bits of nacho cheese.  When I licked the surface, it did NOT taste like Doritos.  Boo.

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded: DRY

The first of these New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded I opened was cold inside…and seemingly DEVOID of that flowing nacho cheese that the picture showed. This was a thick shell of breading with what looked like dried mac and cheese inside.

I actually bit into this one – while it was crispy, and sort of smelled like a Dorito, it did not TASTE like Dorito, and was SUPER SALTY.  Salty breading with some cheese flavor.  Ugh – NEXT!

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded: second one = DRY ALSO

The second New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded I opened up HAD cheese, but it was totally dry.  Ok, this was not good.  It was time to nuke these…

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded: Better?

After nuking, these New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded were a LITTLE better – the nacho cheese sort of melted a bit, and squeezed out a little bit.  I couldn’t get a good color contrast on these photos, and wondered if it was because the extremely orange glow from the nacho cheese was throwing things off.  Or, if I’m just a bad photographer (answer: the latter.  Woops).  Notice the little drips of orange oil? Yeah….

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded

New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded: close up again

But how did these New 7-Eleven Doritos Loaded taste when they actually HAD cheese inside? Verdict: Not…great. They definitely tasted like nacho cheese, through and through.  When there was enough of that orange goo inside, I got plenty of cheese flavor.  Paired with the outer salty breading shell, this did remind me of a fried mac and cheese – but a poor representation, at that.  I’ve had damn good fried balls of mac and cheese before.  These were not good like those.

The inconsistency of the amount of cheese inside was a concern, as some had lots of goo and some didn’t.  When there wasn’t enough cheese, it was just a dry salty shell.  At its best, it was sort of crispy on the outside, sort of saucy on the inside.

I don’t know why they went with the triangle shape; I felt like a tube of nacho cheese might’ve stayed gooey better instead of a flat triangle.  I also don’t know why Doritos endorsed this.

Stay away.

PURCHASED AT: 7-Eleven

COST: 4 for $1.99

Thoughts? Please comment below or hit me up on Twitter @junkfoodguy or LIKE my Facebook Page and message me there. I also have Google+!! Let’s hang out.

Sincerely,

Junk Food Guy

 

Discuss - 31 Comments

  1. MP says:

    I can see why they did it – Nacho cheese Doritos & American cheese are delicious together. I do that with cheese crackers, too.

    • junkfoodguy says:

      @MP: I agree adding a folded piece of american cheese to Doritos sounds pretty intriguing 😛 But these didn’t have the original base flavor, IMO – the Dorito! Disappointed 🙁

  2. Geosage says:

    So, are they full of nacho cheese sauce (like sports game/ movie theatre nachos AKA melted plastic), or are they full of a melted sort of American cheese flavor?

  3. Zo says:

    Cool! Where did you find it/which 7-Eleven store? I want to try it!

    • junkfoodguy says:

      @Zo: Mine were found at the 7-11 near the Van Ness Metro Stop off the red line here in DC…and as of yesterday, they were still there!

  4. Chip Review says:

    These look like a travesty! And your review only confirms that!!

  5. Kahnfucius says:

    I’m worried for you. Clearly, if you watch too much Olympics coverage you get pink eye.

    Also, so far the nbc coverage has been the equivalent of the modern sportscenter highlight package: one or two replays (unless you’re up at 3am) and then constant unnecessary talking.

    Also also ice dancing is the rhythmic gymnastics of winter sports. So it is a sport when you compare it to another non-sport.

  6. Mike N. says:

    Non of the 7-11s around me have hot food (other than roller dogs and taquitos). In fact there aren’t even may 7-11s, but we have tons of QTs (quicktrip.com) and Circle-Ks, Mobil On-the-Run, etc.

  7. Reid T. says:

    Is it necessary to be LOADED to enjoy these?

  8. yuppicide says:

    I loved these. They were cooked perfect if you ask me. Warm, but not too hot. The insides were nice and melty. One out of four of mine seemed to be a little over cooked. They tasted exactly like a Dorito only a tad saltier. I’d definitely buy these again. I only wish they had them in the supermarket, like a big bag of Pizza Rolls.

    I’d love if they made a Doritos flavored grilled cheese sandwich also.

    • junkfoodguy says:

      @Yuppicide – I may need to give them another go. It’s clear that consistency between stores is an issue and getting them FRESH out of the super oven / deep fryer rather than congealed under the heat lamp

  9. shellie says:

    I just wanted to let you know that I actually work at a 7-11. Looking at the pictures you showed, they were in the hot food case too long. I have tried them and if they are cooked the correct way and not allowed to sit for more than an hour they are very good.

    • junkfoodguy says:

      @Shellie: You’re definitely right – they clearly had been sitting out. I may need to give them another go. It’s clear that consistency between stores is an issue and getting them FRESH out of the super oven / deep fryer rather than congealed under the heat lamp.

  10. Joe says:

    I’m eating these now and completely agree with your review. There’s nothing gooey about them. They’re warm, not hot. The cheese is soft-solid and congealed. It seems the inside of the outer coating is absorbing any moisture the cheese once had. And as much as I love salt — I live for salty foods — they’re simply too salty.

    Massively disappointing. Definitely not worth the 360 calories & nearly half a day’s worth of fat.

  11. Esteban says:

    Seriously, what has gone wrong with the worlds taste buds. Any good reviews have to come from people who eat only at Taco Bell, McDonalds and 7-11. Really, eating at 7-11 says volumes for the kind of crap you will eat.

    My review: I bought a couple for my 6 year old so I thought I would give one a nibble. They tasted like buttery, salty cheese throw-up.

  12. gunzan says:

    I work at 7-11 and I love these things. The ones you ate were probably too old and yes, they do suck when they are not fresh out the oven. I eat them 5 mins after its cooked and they taste perfect, with the melted cheese and all that, you know 😉

  13. Ewwwww says:

    These is the most disgusting thing that I’ve ever eaten in my life. I agree with esteban, melted cheese throw up.

    Think I’m going to go to the bathroom and bring these back to their original state.

    Seriously. I completely regret this decision.

  14. Candy says:

    Why don’t they make the outer shell EXACTLY like the chip. I feel like it would taste better.

  15. I bought a package of Doritos loaded jalapeño cheese. What a huge rip off, oh yeah, their loaded, loaded with air!!! Their is only a very thin coating of cheese on the inside. I paid 5.00 for a 15oz bag at Walmart, cooked them as directed, and what a shitty huge rip off!! Taking them back to Walmart asap for full refund on this fucking rip off product!!!!!!!!!

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