Junk Food Nation, let’s talk about how Google is trying to take over the world.  Last week, Google filed for a patent for a electronic skin tattoo that applies to the throat region of the body.  It would, apparently, communicate with smart phones and gaming devices WITHOUT needing to wear Google Glass or have an earpiece.

The potential benefits: the skin sensors could measure blood sugar.  Could measure heart rate, and have incredible medical benefits.  It could reduce waste and mean less to carry.  The negatives: IT’S AN ELECTRONIC NECK TATTOO DESIGNED TO TAKE OVER YOUR LIFE.  DAMN YOU GOOGLE.  IT WAS THE STATUE OF LIBERTY THE WHOLE TIME!!!

How do you all feel about this?  Feels eerily like getting a barcode on your body, right?  You can imagine a dystopian future where we have been enslaved by the machines using these throat tattoos as our shackles. The article even says “The filing says that in addition to sticking via an adhesive to the throat, the tattoo could go on a collar or a band around the user’s neck.” Oh really, a collar around my neck!?  THAT DOESN’T SOUND SCARY AT ALL.

On the positive side, no earpiece.  AH THE FREEDOM.

Personally, I am accepting that there will come a day when our electronic superiors lord over us like the machines in the matrix.  I mean, I already use my smartphone for WAAAY too much and I’m never going back, so it is inevitability for me.  Gimme the neck tattoo, I’m ready – just do it already.  I want Siri in my brain.

Today’s junk food: Culinary Circle Pizza!

So Culinary Circle is a company that makes a bunch of products, like meatballs, sauces, pastas, and frozen pizzas. Culinary Circle wanted me to review one of their frozen pizzas for National Pizza Month, and I am not one to turn down free pizza.  Of course, National Pizza Month was October, and while I’m a little behind, better late than never!

When I went to the store, there were PLENTY of options:

Stacks and stacks of flatbread pizzas, rising crust pizzas, ultra thin crust pizzas.  I settled on the one below:

I chose the Culinary Circle Italian Wood Fired Crust Pizza, the Italian Sausage and Caramelized Onion Pizza.  I chose this one because generally frozen pizzas tend to get onions ALL WRONG, so I wanted to test this brand.This Culinary Circle Pizza was a standard, maybe 10-11 inch pizza, perfect for one-two people.

Culinary Circle Pizza features “imported Italian crust” although the product is not handmade.  The juxtaposition of these words and the photo is priceless.

When it comes to frozen pizza, I’ve eaten a lot of it.  My favorite, by far, is the DiGiorno Pizzeria! Pizzas, but my general go-to are Freschetta pizzas or Red Baron pizzas.  We;ll see where Culinary Circle Pizza stacks up…

1/3 pizza is a serving?  I like that – although I could probably eat this whole thing…

Pre-caramelized onions on this Culinary Circle Pizza? Smart move – I don’t like when frozen pizzas just come with white crystalline onions in its frozen form.

When frozen, the Culinary Circle pizza looks standard – I did enjoy the look of the pre-caramelized onions, however.

Culinary Circle Pizza – DIVIDED IN TO 1/3 PIECES!  Nice.  It smelled pretty good – cheesy and onion-y.  I did get the hint of sage, but I mostly smelled the onion.

I ate 2/3 of this Culinary Circle Pizza, and can give my assessment:

THE POSITIVES: GREAT crust.  Like, really good.  It crisped up in a way that wasn’t TOO crunchy, but provided a nice crispness that went all the way to the center of the pie.  There was no droop at the tips of the pieces.  The edges were crispy yet light, and I didn’t feel like I was stuffing myself with bread.  Italian Wood Fried Crust – thumbs up!

Also, wonderful caramelized onion taste.  Spot on. Unlike other frozen pizzas where the onions are usually a throw away, it was clear that this flavor profile was focused on delivering that sweet onion flavor and making sure it lasted throughout.

THE NEGATIVES: Not really negatives, but the rest of the frozen pizza was just pretty standard in my book.  Reminded me a lot of a Freschetta or Red Baron Pizza.  The cheese was ok, melted well.  The sauce was sweet, but wasn’t bursting with tomato flavor.  The sausage was flavorful, but not memorable.

All in all, I enjoyed this frozen pizza!   And now I’d like for YOU to enjoy one too.

***COMMENT CONTEST***

Since you guys are so good at leaving comments, Culinary Circle is offering a $10 gift card so that you can go to your grocery and buy one or two of their Culinary Circle Pizzas.  All you have to do is leave a comment!  Well, more specifically:

1) Leave a comment about what you think of the Google Neck Tattoo, or of the Culinary Circle Pizza, or of frozen pizzas in general.

2) Be sure to include your email address in the applicable field below so I can email the winner.

3) US ONLY.  Sorry, I don’t think Culinary Circle Pizzas exist outside of the US.

So that’s it!  Leave a comment below, and I’ll chose one …I dunno, by Friday or something.

SO, ENTER THE COMMENT CONTEST!  WIN A $10 GIFT CARD!  BUY PIZZA AND NOM NOM! And thanks again to Culinary Circle.  See you guys tomorrow!

PURCHASED AT: Shoppers

COST: $4.00

Thoughts? Please comment below or hit me up on Twitter @junkfoodguy or LIKE my Facebook Page and message me there. Let’s hang out.

Sincerely,

Junk Food Guy