As Seen in Ireland, Pt. 6 – Irish Storefronts, and Boo Birds Out in KC

Junk Food Nation, last night was the MLB HR Derby, which Prince Fielder decisively won.  Despite the fact that I don’t LOVE the HR Derby, there were a few things I did appreciate. I liked the light blue / dark blue uniforms the players wore.  I liked the impressive display Mark Trumbo put on, nailing balls that almost left the stadium. And who doesn’t like all the little kids running around in the outfield trying to shag fly balls?

A big story from the evening involved last year champion Robinson Cano, of the New York Yankees, who also happens to be my favorite player on the Yanks. He got booed relentlessly by the KC fans for not selecting KC star DH Billy Butler to be part of the HR Derby. See, as last year champ and thus the “captain” of the AL side of the HR Derby, Cano’s job was to select three other players to be in the Derby.  He chose Prince Fielder, Jose Bautista, and Mark Trumbo.  KC didn’t like it, and cheered every whiff Cano had on his way to a 0 HR exit from the competition.

My take on it? I don’t begrudge the fans booing – they can do whatever they want (short of throwing batteries on the field), and I can totally understand their displeasure.  Cano took it in stride and said he didn’t take it personally.  Butler was classy saying that while he appreciated the fans, he didn’t hold a grudge against Cano at all.  Honestly, the booing made for a funny round, and once the All-Star Break is over, no one will even care or remember.

The question remains, SHOULD Cano have chosen Billy Butler?  Well, let’s look at the field.  Cano had to be in it as defending champion.  Bautista is the current AL HR leader, so his selection was a no-brainer.  The remaining two slots could’ve gone to many players more deserving than Prince, Trumbo, or Butler.  Josh Hamilton is tied for the AL HR lead.  Adam Dunn has 25 HRs.  Could Butler have been chosen? Sure…it would’ve been a homer pick not based on the stats, and Butler probably would’ve done fine. But did Butler HAVE to be chosen? Nope.

In today’s “review,” I thought I’d go back to the well and show some things I saw in Ireland during my last visit.  Today: Irish storefronts!

Badass Restaurant upstairs

I actually ate at the Badass Cafe during my last day of the trip, and the food was only semi-badass as opposed to totally badass.  I kept wondering if I was reading the name of the cafe wrong, reminiscent of this:

Yep.

Lick’n?

This shady-ass fried food place takes advantage of the tradition of shortening words that don’t need shortening, and using apostrophes incorrectly.  And yes, that girl off to the side was walking around barefoot.  Classy.

On SALE, too!

I often want a place to have my knob polished AND a place where I can look at Knockers.  This is it.  And on sale, no less!

Acupuncture can eliminate acne??

Dr. China? Sort of offensive.  Plus, I never knew acupuncture could make acne go away.  Then again, Pinhead from Hellraiser did have very good skin.

Get your gamble on

In Ireland, sports betting was legal!  Amazing.  These bookmakers were everywhere, and I loved the name of this one: PADDY POWER!  How Irish 🙂

Figures Shrek loves Man U

It cracked me up that they had Shrek promoting this bookmaker.  #1, totally random, and #2, do you think Dreamworks knows about this potential copyright infringement?

Saddest casino ever

One of my favorite places in the world is Vegas.  I love casinos.  This, however, looked like the casino that a high schooler sets up in his garage.  Anytime a casino sign has Air Conditioning and Internet as a highlight…you know it’s gonna be a shitty casino.

Bravo?

Skinny Billy looks remarkably like Johnny Bravo.

…and I do not want Johnny Bravo cutting my hair.

Potatas

Couch Potatas, home of the tasty spud. The spelling of the word “Potatas” is either colloquially clever or idiotic.  Haven’t decided.

No, YOU be a diva!

You go, Proprietor Carol King! *snap snap*

Classy

This sign was seen inside a mall.  Elegant Undies is an extremely inelegant name for a store, no? Plus, I love how the parenthetical descriptions seemingly match the store names…until you get to “Hell for Leather,” which is described as “The Stall.” Um, what?

Scary!

This is a candy store straight out of Clockwork Orange.  I will not be buying my “candy” from here, thank you.

Errrr…..

This was in my hotel.  Yeah…….I’m not interested in being part of any john-sting operations, thanks.

WTF

Also next to my hotel. Dare to be different? Is this Crypt motif REALLY appealing to club goers?  Maybe for the more goth-types…but do goth-types go to night clubs? I don’t remember many emo kids wanting bottle service in my day.

Moving right along

Mr. Pussy DOES sound legendary…but let’s move on.

If you don’t like it, feck off!

This place now serves food, in fact, “Fine Food for Feck All!” Nice.  I like brutal honesty in my promo ads.

Mexi-Irish!

I enjoy Mexican food, so I was excited to spot this store as well!  La Salsa – how Latino sounding!  Cough.  Features enchiladas, nachos, tostados…quesadillas..and….

Yup

…GRINGO FOOD!  Excellent.  I really was hoping that THAT would be on the menu.  So many things wrong with this; most notably, a gringo is a slang word that Latino peeps call WHITE PEOPLE.  So Gringo food is …”white people food?”  So….Irish food?  What’s going on here, La Salsa.  You confuse me.

Thoughts? Hit me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

Discuss - 11 Comments

  1. SFChin says:

    That was a mega post! I thought I read somewhere that Cano had promised to pick someone from the hometown team for the derby. I think booing is much more justifiable if that’s the case. Not that I think booing in general needs to be justified. And what’s wrong with throwing batteries? And fuck Santa Claus.

  2. So much copyright infringement in Ireland – maybe we should start ripping off some of their characters! Um…do they have any worth ripping off?

    Off to find some gringo food…

    • junkfoodguy says:

      @Teresapalooza: Then again, the US prob steals from Japan all the time…I remember being shocked to find out that Mighty Morphin Power Rangers was an exact ripoff of a Japan show!

  3. Kahnfucius says:

    And I thought they were booing cano just because he was a yankee. Which to me is as worthy a reason to boo as any. So if it was all about not getting to see Billy Butler trying to hit a few homers my estimation for kc fans lowers considerably.

  4. Elisa says:

    Ah, the Power Rangers! I was at Greene Turtle with friends on July 4th; a few of the TVs were set on the Cartoon Channel. (I think, couldn’t see the logo too well) There was a Power Ranger show on. How the cast has changed from when I first saw it in the ’90s!

  5. Will says:

    I got a good laugh out of Gringo food. They would never get away with that here in the USA. Sfchin has to be a Philly fan, I wonder if he or she ever spent time in the old eagles stadium jail cell.

    • junkfoodguy says:

      @Will: Nailed it

    • SFChin says:

      @Will: I was never in the jail cell, although I do have many fond memories of the Vet. Wait, I think I’m unclear on the meaning of “fond”. In any case, at least they left it the color of concrete, so you weren’t under the impression that the stadium was anything other than one step up from an ancient Roman coliseum. Unlike Shea stadium which someone decided to paint garish blue and orange. Easy to fool Mets fans, I guess.

Categories