User Suggested: Caramel Bugles & I Wanna Punch WordPress in the Mouth

Junk Food Nation, WordPress is upset with me. It won’t come out to play. It won’t return my phone calls. It is rude to my parents at Thanksgiving. It refuses to let anyone else play Guitar Hero. It refers to itself in the 3rd person. It is holding out from training camp. It waits for me to pick up the check. It doesn’t hold doors open. It hangs out at bars alone. It wishes it were somewhere else. It uses sarcasm inappropriately.

And apparently, it won’t…let…me…upload…ANYTHING!

So eff it.  Today’s post will unfortunately be abbreviated, and I’ll spend the day trying to figure this out. Tune back in tomorrow, Junk Food Nation – we’ll be back on track (I hope).

Today I thought I’d briefly discuss a junk food my friend Eric suggested to me: Sweet and Salty Caramel Bugles.

The Money Shot: Gross

Many of you already know that Bugles are a junk food I just do not like.  So when my friend Eric suggested I try these snacks, I was conflicted. On one hand, I am usually quick to try anything someone suggests – after all, a food reviewer can’t be choosy.  I am your first line of defense, your first tongue-in-command (yeah that’s right) against new flavors of junk food everywhere!

On the other hand, Bugles are foul.  They taste funny and are not fun. And Sweet and Salty Caramel Bugles are a nightmare I couldn’t have even imagined.  Even if the combo of salt and caramel is a good one (hat tip to Pinkbeery froyo), the idea of slathering this onto a Bugle makes me shiver seven ways to Sunday.  With each crunch, even if there was enough caramel to drown the snack, I’d still know I was eating a Bugle.  I’d still know.

So I won’t be trying these any time soon (unless I somehow get duped).  Ixnay on the Rossgay Uglesbay.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

Discuss - One Comment

  1. Shorneys says:

    “It won’t come out to play. It won’t return my phone calls. It is rude to my parents at Thanksgiving. It refuses to let anyone else play Guitar Hero. It refers to itself in the 3rd person. It is holding out from training camp. It waits for me to pick up the check. It doesn’t hold doors open. It hangs out at bars alone. It wishes it were somewhere else. It uses sarcasm inappropriately.”

    I see you’ve met… um, me.

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