Terra Sweet Potato & Beet Chips & Why I Don’t Like Duke

Besides a food fan, I am a HUGE sports fan.  HUGE.  I can’t even explain how big.  I’m sure I’ll revisit my fandom numerous times during this blog.

Recently, Minnesota Timberwolves president David Kahn made headlines for asking Coach K to leave Duke and coach the T-Wolves.  Analysts laughed at this all over the blogosphere, mercilessly teasing Kahn for thinking that Coach K would leave his precious school for the no man’s land that is the T-Wolves locker room.  (Is this really news, analysts?  Are we so bored that we need to critique a coaching search?  Get a grip.)

Since Duke was in the news, I felt this a perfect time to explain one of my sports stances, which is that I really don’t like Duke.  And its not because they win, or their attitude, or their history.  More on this later, after I examine today’s snack that I REALLY enjoyed:

The Money Shot

Essentially, this “healthy” snack is composed of chips made of sweet potato and beet.  And while they initially sounded gross to me, since these chips were not covered in ranch/cheese/sour cream powder, they are DAMN GOOD.

Wait, what? I need to leave

I know, I KNOW!  A full serving of vegetables in each ounce??  What are you, some kind of wonder chip, Terra Sweets & Beets?  Where do you get off, being both delicious AND healthy?  …I’m watching you, Terra.  Carefully.

Folded over chips are the best

The chips in the bag are colored such that you can clearly see which are the beet chips and which are the sweet potato chips.  Each chip has wonderful folds to improve the crunch.  Chips with folds = snacky heaven.

Follow the yellow (and red) chip road

Looking into this cavern of chips, I am struck how much this looks like a path strewn with beautiful autumn leaves.  Leaves that I wanna stuff into my mouth.

A perfect morsel

As you crunch on these sweet potato chips, the first thing you’ll notice is how tender they are – not quite deep-fried crispy, these definitely feel different against your teeth.  Not that they taste anything similar, but they feel almost like how banana or apple chips may feel – crisp yet soft simultaneously.

Beety goodness

The beet chips feel the same.  And the taste is out of this world.  Slightly sweet, yet salty/savory, almost like a good helping of kettle corn in chip form.  Yet starchy satisfying.

(As a sidenote, I really don’t know why I thought these would be bad – I love sweet potato fries and I enjoy a nice beet salad.  Slice those things down and bake them into chips?? Genius.)

Red means victory...or something

Doesn’t this chip just look like a juicy steak?

Yellow means king...or something

I enjoyed every detail of these chips.  See how the edges of the sweet potato chips maintain a thin ribbon of burnt exterior potato skin?  Well done, Terra.  Well done.

My preferred method of delivery

Really, the only way to eat these chips is to grab several at once, and place into mouth.  Next time, remind me to clean my cuticles before taking these pics.

—-

Oh yeah, so….Duke.  I grew up around people who both loved and hated Duke, and I never really had a problem with the Blue Devils.  I liked Grant Hill and disliked Wojo, so it all balanced out.  I refused to give in to the hype, for or against Duke, much as ESPN wanted me to.

No, the ACC school I really root against is UNC.  Being a Kansas fan, I’ve still never forgiven Roy Williams for leaving KU for North Carolina.  So of course, this past season when my co-worker Hershey bet me lunch that UNC would beat Duke in the final game of the NCAA regular season, after Duke (1) had already beaten them once during the season, and (2) were ranked #4 in the nation vs. UNC’s #13, I jumped at it.  Fine, I’ll root for Coach K.  FINE, I’ll root for Duke.  It was in the bag, right?

Wrong.  You screwed me again, Costanza.  The 14-pt loss left me wondering why oh why did I put my faith in the Blue Devils?  I decided to root for you JUST THIS ONCE and you failed me.  Ugh.  It’s like letting the intern who begs for work every day but who you know not to trust finally do a project, and he not only screws up the project, but he also spills coffee all over the project and accidentally deletes all the project files while surfing tumblr.

So, never again, Duke.  You leave me and my Terra chips alone.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

Discuss - 2 Comments

  1. Lucy says:

    this is really clever E. And bonus points for mentioning the Jayhawks. I guess all those hours spent thinking of ideas in your office (and not doing work) just might pay off.

  2. Lindemann says:

    This blog is everything I hoped it would be and more!

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